How Mental Illness Affects Family, Partners and Carers.
Carer: Any person who cares for someone physically, emotionally, psychologically or mentally.
While mental health has an impact on the sufferer, it also has a significant impact on their loved ones, be it family, partners and/or carers of the individual. Caring/supporting someone with a mental illness can come against practical and emotional obstacles, causing stress for the carer, which in turn can lead to them dealing with mental health issues themselves such as anxiety or depression.
While some carers give emotional support, others support emotionally and physically every day, which can include taking control of finances, managing medication and dealing with a regular crisis.
How do I support/care for someone with mental health problems?
There are many ways you can support your loved one who is going through ill mental health. Caring or supporting someone in this way will be individual to you, as everyone is different. However, there are a few ways that could help every carer, such as:
- Helping to understand the diagnosis of the individual. The more information and knowledge you have, the easier it is to watch out for warning signs of the individual becoming ill or relapsing. Being aware of the diagnosis symptoms can also help you understand certain behaviour.
- Encouraging the individual and setting small, realistic goals between the two of you can be useful for confidence and independence.
- Encourage the individual to attend their treatment as well as take their medication.
- Make a crisis plan for when the individual is really struggling. Personally, I have a crisis box which is full of things that can help me when I'm not doing so well. In it I have anxiety tips, grounding techniques and a safe smell, as well as other things. Also, having contact numbers in the crisis box is a very good idea; if you're in secondary care services, the crisis team or CPN (Community Psychiatric Nurse)/ Care Coordinator. If you're not in with the Community Mental Health service, then having the contact details of walk in centres, GP or local police is useful (and don't worry, the police can be really understanding of patients, but only need to be used in severe cases, such as if the individual is threatening to harm themselves or others, or if they're severely psychotic.
- Look after yourself too- physically and mentally. This is really important. If you need a break, take one. You do not have to feel guilty for this. Supporting someone can be incredibly difficult and can have a major impact on loved ones.
What help is available for carers/loved ones?
Due to the government cuts within the NHS, I personally believe there is not enough support for carers and loved ones, there are a few services that can help:
- If you are feeling stressed or starting to have problems mentally, such as depression or anxiety, visit your GP. You may be referred to counselling or CBT (Cognitive Behavioural Therapy) to learn to cope with your emotions and feelings.
- Families can access BFT (Behavioural Family Therapy) through the individual's care team or GP. This is a skills-based therapy with a qualified therapist in order to learn how to communicate as a family, problem solving skills and coping techniques.
- Couples Therapy on the NHS (accessed through GP). This can help couples engage in communicating effectively in a safe space.
- Benefits, such as Carer's Allowance, can help you financially while you support a loved one with a mental illness. Apply online at GOV.co.uk
- There are a few respite opportunities for carers that really need a break, such a through Rethink Mental Illness.
- One-to-one support: Emotional and practical support including psycho-education and goal planning, using our Carer Support Planning Tools through Rethink Mental Illness.
- While Care coordinators/CPNs prioritise the sufferers wellbeing, they are also a good support for the loved ones too.
Personal stories from my loved ones
Since November 2015, my mother has been my main support and official carer. There have been times when I have been really ill and she has had to watch my finances, make my meals, prompt me to shower and deal with various crises. The support she has received has been next to none, apart from odd trips out with my support worker. While there is help for carers, there's not enough. Here is my mother's story:
"While I am more than happy to care for my daughter because I love her, being a carer is extremely difficult. When my daughter lived at home with me, I was a full time carer to her. I supported her emotionally and physically as well as looked after her medication and reminded her of appointments. I had to witness some very distressing impact my daughter's mental health had on her, which is upsetting and frustrating, because I can't take it away or fix it. At one point I became so stressed that I started having anxiety, including palpitations and insomnia. A lot of the time I felt I didn't have support and so I felt really isolated, which caused depression and worry. I love my daughter and will always support her, but there needs to be more emotional and physical support out there for carers"
It's been hard to see the effects being a carer has had on my mother but she has shown me her immense strength and stamina throughout this.While my mother is still my carer, I also have a huge amount of support from my boyfriend, Ryan, from encouraging me to be open about my issues as well as helping me see things from another perspective and showing me love. Here is Ryan's story:
"Being a support for the person I love can be very testing and hard at times, but in the end if you truly love the person (which I do), it's worth it all. We all need the care and nurturing we deserve. I admit that it's no walk in the park, especially having gone through some issues myself but it's always good to reach out and it's important to have someone to support you and encourage you to power through it all. I've been worried, stressed and upset over seeing someone I love in such pain and distress. It's really hard but it does get easier, especially when they're doing well. We all have our coping mechanisms, we just have to make sure they're not destructive. I'm a strong believer in the acronym of HOPE- hold on pain ends, and that is what keeps me going in supporting the woman I love."
Don't underestimate carers, they do a lot and if you are one, bloody well done! Your strength is impeccable!
While mental health has an impact on the sufferer, it also has a significant impact on their loved ones, be it family, partners and/or carers of the individual. Caring/supporting someone with a mental illness can come against practical and emotional obstacles, causing stress for the carer, which in turn can lead to them dealing with mental health issues themselves such as anxiety or depression.
While some carers give emotional support, others support emotionally and physically every day, which can include taking control of finances, managing medication and dealing with a regular crisis.
How do I support/care for someone with mental health problems?
There are many ways you can support your loved one who is going through ill mental health. Caring or supporting someone in this way will be individual to you, as everyone is different. However, there are a few ways that could help every carer, such as:
- Helping to understand the diagnosis of the individual. The more information and knowledge you have, the easier it is to watch out for warning signs of the individual becoming ill or relapsing. Being aware of the diagnosis symptoms can also help you understand certain behaviour.
- Encouraging the individual and setting small, realistic goals between the two of you can be useful for confidence and independence.
- Encourage the individual to attend their treatment as well as take their medication.
- Make a crisis plan for when the individual is really struggling. Personally, I have a crisis box which is full of things that can help me when I'm not doing so well. In it I have anxiety tips, grounding techniques and a safe smell, as well as other things. Also, having contact numbers in the crisis box is a very good idea; if you're in secondary care services, the crisis team or CPN (Community Psychiatric Nurse)/ Care Coordinator. If you're not in with the Community Mental Health service, then having the contact details of walk in centres, GP or local police is useful (and don't worry, the police can be really understanding of patients, but only need to be used in severe cases, such as if the individual is threatening to harm themselves or others, or if they're severely psychotic.
- Look after yourself too- physically and mentally. This is really important. If you need a break, take one. You do not have to feel guilty for this. Supporting someone can be incredibly difficult and can have a major impact on loved ones.
What help is available for carers/loved ones?
Due to the government cuts within the NHS, I personally believe there is not enough support for carers and loved ones, there are a few services that can help:
- If you are feeling stressed or starting to have problems mentally, such as depression or anxiety, visit your GP. You may be referred to counselling or CBT (Cognitive Behavioural Therapy) to learn to cope with your emotions and feelings.
- Families can access BFT (Behavioural Family Therapy) through the individual's care team or GP. This is a skills-based therapy with a qualified therapist in order to learn how to communicate as a family, problem solving skills and coping techniques.
- Couples Therapy on the NHS (accessed through GP). This can help couples engage in communicating effectively in a safe space.
- Benefits, such as Carer's Allowance, can help you financially while you support a loved one with a mental illness. Apply online at GOV.co.uk
- There are a few respite opportunities for carers that really need a break, such a through Rethink Mental Illness.
- One-to-one support: Emotional and practical support including psycho-education and goal planning, using our Carer Support Planning Tools through Rethink Mental Illness.
- While Care coordinators/CPNs prioritise the sufferers wellbeing, they are also a good support for the loved ones too.
Personal stories from my loved ones
Since November 2015, my mother has been my main support and official carer. There have been times when I have been really ill and she has had to watch my finances, make my meals, prompt me to shower and deal with various crises. The support she has received has been next to none, apart from odd trips out with my support worker. While there is help for carers, there's not enough. Here is my mother's story:
"While I am more than happy to care for my daughter because I love her, being a carer is extremely difficult. When my daughter lived at home with me, I was a full time carer to her. I supported her emotionally and physically as well as looked after her medication and reminded her of appointments. I had to witness some very distressing impact my daughter's mental health had on her, which is upsetting and frustrating, because I can't take it away or fix it. At one point I became so stressed that I started having anxiety, including palpitations and insomnia. A lot of the time I felt I didn't have support and so I felt really isolated, which caused depression and worry. I love my daughter and will always support her, but there needs to be more emotional and physical support out there for carers"
It's been hard to see the effects being a carer has had on my mother but she has shown me her immense strength and stamina throughout this.While my mother is still my carer, I also have a huge amount of support from my boyfriend, Ryan, from encouraging me to be open about my issues as well as helping me see things from another perspective and showing me love. Here is Ryan's story:
"Being a support for the person I love can be very testing and hard at times, but in the end if you truly love the person (which I do), it's worth it all. We all need the care and nurturing we deserve. I admit that it's no walk in the park, especially having gone through some issues myself but it's always good to reach out and it's important to have someone to support you and encourage you to power through it all. I've been worried, stressed and upset over seeing someone I love in such pain and distress. It's really hard but it does get easier, especially when they're doing well. We all have our coping mechanisms, we just have to make sure they're not destructive. I'm a strong believer in the acronym of HOPE- hold on pain ends, and that is what keeps me going in supporting the woman I love."
Don't underestimate carers, they do a lot and if you are one, bloody well done! Your strength is impeccable!
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